Melbourne Cup Luncheon 2009

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I'm never a fan of horse-racing, and have not even been on a live one! In saying that, the closest I have come to racing was during my short stint in the audit at the Singapore Turf Club. It was interesting to look at the distinction in crowd that pour in on a race night. They either came in hordes from the back gate via the public train, or, the VIPs would pull up at the front porch in attention-grabbing luxurious cars. I used to feel really odd walking off home after work in the opposite direction from the crowd's flow.

It was yet another year of work luncheon over the big race of the year yesterday. Melbourne Cup 2009 marked more than 16 months of my service with the resort. I wonder how I made it through the one year mark in the first place. After whining over the same things over and over at least 2 - 3 times a week, over 16 months, I'm really surprised that I'm not yet sick of complaining!

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_SxiYoHT5ab4/SRGI7lptBBI/AAAAAAAAA6k/yKr0SD7Al8w/s400/Melbourne+Cup.jpg" border="0" /> Melbourne Cup and wine goes hand in hand. Wise Wine was our sponsor =)

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Good food, and great presentation, is not any paler by comparison!

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And photos of my nasty, messy, little office/ work area for the very first time!I was only making my way down to Margaret River after work for dinner with the bosses. I love my red checked high-waist skirt from Forever 21 Singapore. Thanks Sis, for encouraging me to make that purchase! =)

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_SxiYoHT5ab4/SRGNskDd-CI/AAAAAAAAA7M/nXTsDyxNglM/s400/Liquor+Licensing+Course.jpg" border="0" />My outfit for TODAY's liquor licensing course. The course was great! It's a fresh perspective to look at how another country's rules and regulations differ from Singapore's. The Australian government does takes a serious view on responsible service of alcohol, and in defining the duty of care from licensed venues. With the complicated laws, I just had to laugh my head off when our trainer said that it always pay to have a good corporate legal adviser!

Would soon be time for me to submit my report for compliance (or non-compliance) for our venue! Not exciting at all!

More guilty indulgence

I HAVE RELOCATED!!!

The header is just a joke... I have started to blog on Multiply a while ago, cos it's user-friendly enough to suit my IT proficiency level.

http://shwong84.multiply.com/

Mercy On Those Detested SOuls!

I try not to allow people to irritate me. And I try even harder not to loathe anyone. But some people just make it impossible.

I can't help but feel this sense of injustice inflicted on me by some people who are just weird and illogical. And I cant help but despise people who pretend to be so great and try to undermine me in my back. I am truly disgusted by the pool of incompetent fools (or whatever nouns you can think of) I am surrounded with.

I feel deeply humiliated by people who thinks that Im so desperate for the position. But truly, I feel that the ones who are in a desperate position are the incompetent ones. Well, I pity them. I REALLY DO. I'm proud of how much self worth I have. Therefore, it is not too difficult to have sympathy on people who can only manage to use that tiny bit of operable capacity of their brains to do useless things. I feel so sad for non-achievers who get by in life by telling lies, finding excuses for themselves, shifting blame onto others or simply by taking advantage of people all the time to push ahead of their own agenda.

Some people just have to live a sad life because they're being hated (by me?? haha... I try not to, but please understand how hard it takes...) It's really SAD. I feel sorry for these people sometimes. Well, at least, I bother to feel sorry for them...

BIG SIGH! God, I certainly dont take delight in getting irritated by such people. Please help me to love these people cos THEY"RE SO PATHETIC!! Hahahahaha!!!

Israeli and Arab TV News Show Different Sides of War

This is interesting...

It's Friday.. But..

It's Friday again. Add one more week to my stay in Australia please!

It's hard to believe how time flies. The sweet sleep in my cosy bed just the night before my departure doesn't seem to feel that far away. The "Last Thursday in Singapore" that I was talking about with Beng on MSN feels only like yesterday (taking into account that today's indeed Friday, "Last Thursday in Singapore" feels so real). It feels like it was only hours ago when I was fighting back my tears futilely as I watched my mum pulling out a piece of tissue to dry her tears discretely.

Yet, at the same time, I feel that I have been around for so long. That statement must have been the perfect irony.

So much things had happened and I was half-joking with Angela once, that it's a good bargain-- going through quite abit in merely three months. Yes, quite abit, in my own sense of measurement and capacity. I would understand if someone begs to differ. And that was three months, at the point of conversation.

I'm feeling so defeated now. I wouldn't dare to breathe my loneliness and weakness to anyone. I don't think I know where to start from either. I feel like I'm back to the bottom of the pit again. It's not solely because of work and being on my own most of the time that makes me feel sickened of everything. I'm just feeling so down and it annoys me even more when I can't put my fingers on things or even find the strength to pull myself out of the situation.

I really miss the times when I get knocked out the moment I hit my bed. The memories of the comfort of my own home smell so sweet, but sadly, too far away.

But well, God is always fair enough. Someone will always bring consolation at the most unexpected moment. Someone will always draw me away just before I hit the trough. And I thank God for these people...

To give a balanced view of my life here, I learnt to appreciate and came to recognise sincere friends. I certainly know that my poly friends will always be there to lend a listening ear (if I am able to put things across). Elaine's another sweetie who never stops showing her lil' gestures of concern and motivation. To top it all, I made my first real friend here!! In just three months! Cheers!

Just a pity that she'll be heading back to Thailand tonight. Nonetheless, she's a lovely gift from God and I'll never forget the chilly walk back from the dinner.. Our laughter seem to melt away the bitter-cold atmosphere on the streets.

Nothing's going to be too bad and hopeless. I HOPE...

Just another day of doing nothing

Im the biggest loser of the day. Wasted my time doing nothing much...

Did the laundry... I've just collected the clothes which were hung to dry yesterday. They are still sitting in the laundry basket, looking like a mass of wrinkled thrash.

What other stuff have i been doing? Just sleeping, surfing the net, tempting myself with new fashion designs and bitching with my friends on MSN about work. This is my typical sunday. U wont believe that I can just squander my time and do silly things like this right?

Yeah, I certainly did! Sitting on my ass and getting angry over things.

I hate people who are exploitative

I hate people who are unfeeling

I hate people who are blinded by the speck of dust in their eyes but never bothered to remove them, before they start to find fault with others

I hate people who are unsincere

I hate people who are pretentious

I hate people who cant lead by example

All in all, I just hate people who are crap.

Im just so damn irritated...

And im f**king angry with myself for wasting my time... how did i manage to sleep for so long???

I think Im crap too...

Little gestures that make a difference

Never under-estimate the power of little thoughtful gestures. It can make a huge difference and brightens up someone's day unknowingly.

El's unexpected mail really warmed my heart. It just brought light to my dreadful day. I have been feeling really down recently. Work bogged me down quite abit and I thought everyone's too far away to understand what I'm going through. I thought emails can never convey how upset I am.

Things got pretty complicated here. But it just surprised me that a simple letter that carries the essence of encouragement and support can make me feel so much better.

One lesson to be learnt today: We often do or say things unintentionally. It can either hurt or brighten someone's day unknowingly.

The other thing to learn is, I can be the only pilot of my own life. I can either choose to apreciate and RECOGNISE the simple gifts of life, or allow nasty things to upset me.

El has always been a thoughtful friend. That's probably one positive thing I need to pick up from her. I've made the mistake of saying awful things to the one I love and has unintentionally hurt them. I have got lots of people who cares and means alot to me. So, I'm not going to allow bad characters at work to bring me down.

Well, besides continuously learning new things about life, we shouldnt forget to seek positivity and appreciation in the gloomy environment that appeared to be plagued by bad elements. I'm still the happy lil' girl, and I'll live.. =)

Friends

Once, at a certain stage in my life, I felt so betrayed by friends. In the recent 3 or 4 years, i began to feel differently about my circle of friends. I came to know new friends from all walks of life. And I'm especially thankful to friends who have made a difference to my life.

My poly clique helped me to see the importance and responsibility to care for my family. They helped me to realise how to love and recover from love that hurts emotionally. They have motivated me. And they're my confidants. Poly life could never be that enjoyable without them!

Then, I got to know my uni bunch, whom I managed to bond with them, after a while. I realised that even very different people can still be great friends, so long as there is understanding and acceptance. Sincerity counts alot in most friendships.

Even for friends whom I hardly get to meet, they can just understand my emotions easily as i pour my troubles to them. These includes Amy and Sharon.

And then there's this bunch of friends from YMCA. People from different professions, coming together serving the same cause for the less priviledged. It's been a joy volunteering with YMCA, meeting people who went through very different life experiences. They opened up another side of Singapore's society, which is often obscured and neglected.

Really cant bear to leave the friendships that I've built up here. Friends are not easy to come by. And I believe that's especially true as age catches up with a person.

A friend is always someone whom you can count on, whether you get to meet up often or not. The bond is always there, as you remember and treasure the moments when you first get started, and the process of building up the friendship.

Life could never be complete without reliable friends. And of course, dont forget about family members who will always care.

The Zazazu

A friend forwarded me this email on the Zazazu. I thought that was a strange word! Anyway this email verbalised this confusion in me when I was still battling with my decision about the breakup. Nonetheless, I've made the decision to continue seeking out for that A* grade. I have every freedom and right to experience the most romantic thing in life, even though many would say that romance doesnt equate to love.

But see, life could only be beautiful if I choose to romance and enjoy the chemistry exchange between my partner and I. Sharon was so right when she questioned why we should conform to the norms and conventions. Does marriage really guarantee happiness? If it doesnt, why do I need to settle for anything below A* (A* by my own standards of cos. Who else could be a better judge than me, myself???) when i could possibly be better alone?

I could see myself travelling around half the globe with my lil' backpack, experiencing the sights and sounds of the world, feeling happy and carefree.

One might argue that everyone has their own physical and emotional needs. Therefore, we would be forced to conform to the conventions of getting married and having kids ultimately. Prob with someone who could not meet the grade.

Well, my rhetorical reply would be, someone who could not meet the grade would never be able to satisfy those needs, even though trying hard might make a small difference.

Whatever it is, here goes the zazazu!






The Za Za Zu

This zazazu thing is really hard to find. It seems like that is what we're all searching for, the zazazu guy with the qualities of a good boyfriend. Someone who cares and takes care of you, and on top of that, you must feel the zing whenever you're with him. We debated, should we ever compromise the two factors X & Y, or should we stick to a ratio that we're comfortable with? Yesterday we babes said that we shouldn't settle for less, we should never settle for grade B at our age right now. but what about A-? Or do we want to stick to grade A (the perfect guy with 1:1 ratio of zazazu and boyfriend qualities) before we decide to marry? You must know that zazazu is not equivalent to physical qualities. It's just that special chemical X that each of us will feel about the One.

I was sure that I do not want to marry someone who's not the One. I still believe that he's out there. Sure, we may not be absolutely sure if he is the One but I'm sure of one thing, he should be the person I cannot live without. By that standard, I should be able to make my judgements correctly. I think. I can think of one person that I cannot live without, but there isn't the zazazu, I think. doesn't that contradict? So now I would have to re-access how I can make my conclusion on the One. How about, it should be a feeling, that you would just know? That's something that I have heard from my married friends, that you'll know when he comes along.

So we shouldn't worry too much right? That is, ceteris paribus.

We are all growing. Older by the day. Given that you may want to have kids, maybe 2 kids, you should at least have the first kid before 30. So we count backwards. Prob you'll want to have a married life without kids for 2 years, so that makes you to be 27 to get married. (2 years of mlwk and then 9 mths of pain carrying the baby). And given that a normal dating lifespan is 2 years for you to find out if the r/ship is working out, the latest age that I have to start dating the One is 25.

We thought that we still have 3 blocks of 2-years to find that One. We're seriously wrong. Unless getting married is unimportant, having kids are not a priority. Which I think is the truth for me. Right now at least. who's to say that 5 years from now I won't change my mind? That's when we'll start to panic. And will be then settle for grade B!?! That's a horrifying thought.

Is it better to stay single than to marry grade B? Or how about we settle for grade A- right now? Do we have the luxury of time to make the correct decision right now? Or rather, the luxury of choices? If we are holding on to A-, do we want to give it up in search of A* or do we hold on to A-, just in case? But it's not fair to A- to be kidnapped when you know that there's a high possiblity that marriage will not happen if someone better comes along.

But, what if A* doesn't exist?

We're in limbo most of the time, searching and seeking. L is right, we have to put ourselves out there, we all do. Imagine a big wide open space, the sun rises and sets and all these people stand around, walk around, looking for that person. Time passes and still the same group wanders around. Even those who have found someone, they are still wandering around, 'is he/she the one?'. I can imagine a painting like that. I would like to paint that out.

And so this question remains, what is your own comfortable balance of factor X and Y? Maybe eventually my own would be a ratio of 2:1. I think I'll value the zazazu more. That's so hard to find. so hard.